"Preach the gospel at all times, if necessary use words." - St. Francis of Assisi

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Murphy's Law - (a tongue in cheek article, but, sadly true)

What happens when a slightly obsessive-compulsive, a-retentive, borderline neurotic about organization guy hits the unexpected in his well thought and planned out schedules? On the outside all may seem well and calm, but on the inside is a literal firestorm cauldron burning from the toes to the ears and consuming each body organ in between. Well, perhaps that was a tish dramatic, but we SOCARBN people do not usually like an unexpected change. This was the case last Saturday.

I had my plans made. They had been made well in advance for Saturday. They were on my kitchen calendar, my office calendar, in my PDA, on my laptop calendar and sticky notes on the back door. There was a funeral to play for at 1:30pm, then pizza's to pick up at 5:30pm for a party at 6:00pm. Simple, no problem, everything was set and I was ready to face the day. Until......

About 11:00am I had finished some work in the living room and went into the solarium to plug my laptop back in for charging. As I stepped into the kitchen, I noticed that my feet seemed to feel like they were covered with water. I glanced down and, lo and behold, they were!! The washer had picked that particular day to break down and flood my kitchen and sunroom and the water was laughingly (yes, I know it was laughing) edging toward my living room and the carpet in there. I let out a banshee shriek which sent Murphy scurrying under the bed, most of the local animals ran to the nearby wooded areas and parents were grabbing their children off the sidewalks. Naturally, I was grabbing towels and rugs and sheets and anything else that would absorb water and was tossing them at doorways in effort to stop the flow. Murphy knew if he came out from under the bed, he would be flung in the river, too. After a few minutes, I thought, "Gee, idiot, why don't you turn off the machine and the water spigots. That might help a little bit."

So, with that done, I grabbed the wet-vac from a neighbor and began siphoning up the half-inch of water that contained strange things with dark tendrils which had floated out from beneath the washer and dryer. When the vacuum cut on and the suction started, well, Murphy abandoned my bed and went to the farthest room in the house and went into the closet and found refuge under a stack of luggage . All I could see were two eyes and a snout quivering in the darkness. The wet-vac worked sufficiently and even got most of the water from the berber carpet in the solarium and in the el-cheapo carpet in the living room. Glancing at my watch, I realized I was supposed to be leaving for the funeral in about 20 minutes and still had not ordered the pizzas.....or taken a bath. So, embarrassingly to admit, I stuck my head under the kitchen spout to wet it enough to comb, grabbed some blue jeans and a polo shirt to wear (heck, what do they make choir robes for anyway?) and took off leaving Murphy wondering what had happened.

That one event threw off the rest of my day. A friend called and hearing the octave higher cadence of my voice, volunteered to order the pizzas for me. After all the hubbub, the party that night was fun and a nice way to relax. But, my mind was still racing ahead to when I got home and had to start putting the furniture back into the kitchen, haul back in the areas rugs and doormats and put into the dryer BECAUSE I would never be able to go to sleep with the room in a mess like it was. Then, what was I going to do about the clothes I needed to wash and how much a new washer would cost (since this one was 28 years old and was time to replace anyway).

Fortunately, I got home, the floor was dry and most things could be put back into place. My plans were made and placed on the various calendars to shop for a new washer on Sunday afternoon, hoping it would be delivered on Monday so I could catch up on laundry Monday and Tuesday evenings after work. It succeeded. The calendars went off without another hitch in the schedule and my world is once again a cozy place, except for Murphy who is still very hesitant to leave the safety of my bedroom. I tend to find humor in the fact that various aspects of THE Murphy's Law deal with expecting the unexpected and I also named my dog, Murphy. I should have suspected something at that point. Plus, I am sure I gave God a good chuckle for the day..... probably a down right guffaw is closer to the truth.

All in all, I haven't quite turned into "Monk" and I figure since I recognize that, I must be doing okay (shrug, twitch, twitch).

Things are well in the world,
Be God's,
Jimmy

1 Comments:

At 11:54 AM, Blogger Jan Price said...

Jimmy,

What a terrible thing to have happen to Murphy. (You scaring him half to death.) You big bully!

Seriously, you do lead an exciting life. I hope you and your clothes finally got a bath. :-)

Give Murphy an extra treat from Buddy and Merci.

 

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