I've learned that sometimes you just gotta go back to the basics, even when you don't think you need to. Such is the case with me at this point. I figure a lot of people read this blog and (hopefully) gain something from it because of my own life situations that they can identify with. So, as I start on a new beginning, as I start over again, follow along with me and see if my mistakes can be avoided in your Walk.
The title of this blog, "Being God's" means what? It came from the fact that I would always sign emails and letters with "Be God's". I figured it wasn't quite as churchy sounding as "In His Name," "In His Love," and similar things, plus it was a reminder to whomever I was writing to "Be God's." It's kinda like my closing which began, oh, probably twenty years ago when I would say at the end of a class, or a talk or a column....."and this has been the gospel according to Jimmy."
Anyway, the Being God's blog is to indicate that I belong to God. No doubt in my mind, I do. However, over recent months, I have been through many struggles and dark days which allowed Satan and his demons to enter my heart and mind little by little until a fairly wide gap had come between me and God. The God to which I belong. The God I love and want to serve. During this time, I have hurt people, written things on this blog that were harmful (now removed), and continued the struggle to be in control of my own life, not allowing God to get back to his spot on the throne in my life.
The fork in the road has now come. I have spent several sleepless nights, yes, literally sleepless, in trying to force myself to reject my current spiral and turn back to the Light of God. It was difficult because I am a stubborn person, plus I was ashamed of how far I had fallen. However, thanks be to God for faithful friends and their prayers and words of support, concern, and encouragement. Thanks for a Pastor who met with me and encouraged me where I needed it, kicked me in the appropriate way where I needed it, and showed me he was a friend, a shepherd and was standing in the gap for me.
That night, the tears flowed most of the night one of sleeplessness. I realized the next day that God had cleansed me of some baggage through the tears. The next morning, I felt the glimmer of Jimmy again. The Jimmy who shares "Being God's" with the cyber-world, writes columns in newspapers and magazines, and has a witness through this vehicle.
I have deliberately taken this first step back and I hope if you reading this and are struggling will follow me along the way. I have begun asking forgiveness from those I have harmed, whether intentionally or unintentionally. I also have a hard time apologizing and asking for forgiveness, but I know this is a scriptural thing I need to do. As these people of God accepted my apologies without hesitation or judgement, the tears of cleansing and healing began again.
Folks, it's so much easier to let God take care of things. When I was doing it by myself, I screwed it up royally. I mean, really messed it up. Follow me as I share with you of my travel back to the One who made me His, so that once again I can truthfully say, I am Being God's.
Each time, I'll share a verse that I'm claiming along my path. Maybe they'll be of encouragement to you. Today.....
"Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name and you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through the rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fires of oppression, you will not be burned up. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." (NLT)
And for today my friends, this has been the gospel according to Jimmy. Be God's!